MIA

Something's missing. Somehow, somewhere along the way I lost it. I blocked it off, that part of my mind. Those memories, they've disappeared. Locked away in some remote part of my brain, somewhere inaccessible  Collecting dust, never to see the light again.

One Word.

Emotionless. 

Patience

One thing my generation is lacking, is patience. We want everything immediately. And if we don't already have it in our hands by the time we think of it, we get frustrated. I'm guilty of it too. I've heard some of the older folk talking about how we got this way. They blame the technology, and if you think about it. They're right. Microwaves give us food in minutes that would normally take 5-10x as long-or longer. Phones allow us instant contact with our loved ones. The Internet gives us the ability to find information almost instantly. Honestly, it's sad. Especially when patience becomes a forgotten virtue.

Desires of My Heart

I thought I had to give up all my dreams to follow your plan God. But I was wrong, you want me to have dreams. That’s what that message was all about. “I have a dream” But that’s my problem right now. I gave up all my dreams and sit here empty handed. So God, here’s my dream. A lifelong dream, something I will hold onto for years to come. Not only do I dream of following after you and helping people into your kingdom. That’s obviously the top dream of mine. But Lord, you want me to have my own dream. My own personal dream. So Lord, here it is. I dream of writing books. Yes Lord that’s it. I dream of writing books and  reaching people….

Confirmation ?

Confirmation, where do I get it? How can I get it? How do I know, for sure, that this is what he's telling me? I think he's saying one thing, but then I don't know for sure if it's just me or not. Like, is this just a physical desire and not something sent from God? How am I to know?

Into the Field

That's what I'm wanting, to go out into the field. Am I ready? Now that's something else entirely. All I know is that I want to go. I've been wanting to do this for years, since I went to Mexico back in 2007. My only problem is that I've never been ready. Now, its not only me saying "I'm not ready" My own mother has said the same thing "You're not ready yet, give it some time." People are worried that I'll get there and then freak out because of the stuff I'm seeing. But that still doesn't keep me from wanting to go. I can't help it, the desire is there. The urge is there. I've begged God to just send me. But...it's not the right time.

Unexplainable Happiness

Something's moving, something's changing. See his glory. Feels like Heaven on Earth. 

Yes I did sing the above over and over again for nearly an hour. As well as sang "Blessed Be Your Name" Man, I don't know what's going on here! I'm so happy, it's just unexplainable! I made my usual video for Alana and she just laughed and told me "Hon, that unexplainable happiness is the holy spirit" Or you know, something along those lines. :) I'm so hyped up I can't even think straight. All I know is that my body is moving along with this song and I'm just....going crazy. 

I've never been like this and DANG! I'm just enjoying it over here! 

I can't stop moving. I can't stop singing. This is just me. And I'm loving it.