My "collection"

My collection that's how I refer to it now. The little row of delicately placed mini scars that I...sort of put there. All at low points, but still. They are there and they are visible to everyone, not just me. I didn't hide them on my wrist or stomach. They are there for all to see. Though most don't have the slightest idea because they are so small and they don't think that a "good little christian girl" like me would ever go there. Oh but if only they knew. If only they knew that I'm not exactly that good little girl they all assumed I was. Oh they'd rethink then, they'd rethink the idea of letting their darling "babies" hang out with me. They'd rethink the idea of asking me to babysit, to help out around the camp/church. They'd rethink it all. And where would I be then? Alone once more...oh but wait. I have my little collection to keep me company. Don't want to forget about those little things. (It's kinda hard when every time you wash your hands there they are, every time you type there they are, every time you hand something over...there they are...daily reminders...as if I needed that.) Honestly, I've tried to hide them. Not really for me...but more for others. YES! I admit it. They are embarassing. They show off how low I've sunk. How pathetic my life is that I've got to revert to that! So yes, I've tried wearing long sleeves...works okay..in winter. I've tried makeup, didn't work so well, I've tried jewelry...never managed to stay there long enough. I guess I can't hide it, especially not with me adding to it every few months. *Sigh* If only I had never sunk this low.